Should have saved for a meandering day

Things I have noticed this week......
- I am out of fashion! After spending and hour in the mall the other day, quickly browsing and listening to the meltdown of a toddler every time I entered a store that was not near the carousel or had some sort of child entertainment. I took a quick look at the young girls in the stores wearing what I did when I was 15, really with the skinny jeans and hi-tops. My hips would never get away with that look now a days. Then I took a glance in the mirror and thought oui what have I become. I have not shopped for myself in so long I don't even know where to begin putting pieces together for a new wardrobe(not that I could afford one right now). Still I can not focus, who brought that annoying beast of a child in this store who sounds like a broken record "I WANNA GO ON THE CAROUSEL" over and over again?? OH yeah that would be mine I recognize the blonde hair but not the face buried into the rug below the shiny ruffled tops.
- Enough with the roots already! My hair is in desperate need of scissors and bleach or some sort of hair color. Honestly I can not remember the last time I had it done. Last week I liked the longer look but today it's gotta go! If it wasn't for the grey throwing off the highlights my roots are a good two and a half inches long. Something has to be done before I pull a Britney!
- Life is short! I attended a funeral yesterday in support of a friend who lost her sister in-law to soon. The young mother of two(10yr & 3yr) was only 32 years old. As I sat and listened to the service I longed to run home and squeeze Morgan, knowing time is precious and we don't get to choose our time to leave we can only cherish the time we have.
- Five day work weeks are hard! This was the first full week of work since January. I go back to four days next week. As much as I miss the pay I enjoy the time with my baby (I mean big girl) more.
- Never take a potty training toddler out to dinner by yourself! I had a taste for a steak the other day, so I decided on the place with the peanuts. Thought it would be a nice distraction for a toddler to peel her own peanuts and teach her to throw the shells on the floor. My thought proved to be a 15 min time killer until she had to go PEE. We made our way to the public bathroom which I cringe because it is hard enough for me to hover over the seat let alone try to hold a squirming toddler. We made it out alive. Our dinner came and she had to PEE again. I assured our waitress we were not trying to dine and dash and not to clear our table, she just laughed. Two trips to the public bathroom, still alive. What a pain in the ass to have to carry your purse, secure your table and take a 10 minute potty break!

About Last Night

This may sound as if I don't love every minute I spend with my darling daughter. Let me assure you I would give my last dying breathe for that child of mine. There comes a time in a single parents life when holy begeezious you just need a break from the mundane routine of it all.

Last night my more than generous in-laws, who I never broke up with since the divorce, took Morgan for the night. I did not realize until I got home from a couple stores that I leisurely strolled through, stopping to smell new shoes and notice over priced sales tags. I got home sat on the couch flipped on the TV banned all shows that involve music and learning, switched to the free on demand movies. Made a trip to the bedroom to find my cozy pants, a comfortable pillow, and Breaking Dawn. Before I opened my dinner, a bag of White Castle. I called to check in on Morgan who had informed me that she had not cried about me and was running for the door to get her last ride on the golf cart for the night with her Grandpa. I proceeded to watch Made of Honor, which was a cute funny chic flick just perfect for my night alone! It was 6pm the night was young and I was on my couch eating food without worrying if anything would drop on the floor, not being beckoned to the play room to make supper, there was not one demand to turn on Dora and get another juice. There was only me, my remote, a book and the comfort of home.

Only thing was I had to take a Tylenol PM to get to sleep because I missed the little princess so much, my mind kept wondering if she was ok. I knew she was but my mothering instinct would not shut off, something tells me it never will. Once the sleep came I didn't know I really needed it until this morning when I woke to my alarm and felt refreshed for the day, rejuvenated to start over again. This parenting job is tough, but I wouldn't trade it for the world.

Like a Flick on the Head

There really is a million excuses why I don't update here on a regular basis, but rest assure I have every intention to do so in a minute. With today's technology of Facebook, DVR, and text messaging my world completely turns every so often I get hooked into one thing only then oh look something shiny...... my point I guess is I am not good a multi-tasking as I once thought I was. It could be an early sign of dementia or old age woman set in her ways only the ways change and I get over obsessed with the task at hand that I completely forget what I did yesterday. Good thing Morgan doesn't need a bottle anymore the kid would starve, how was it I remembered feeding schedules, bowel movements and bath time in the early parenting years? Just a short 24 months later I can't remember if I have given her the four basic food groups, or is it five. Can someone hand me a fresh pen and a stack of post-it notes.
Summer has been one fun filled weekend after another. Just when I thought I could rest and enjoy the day at home we get invited to another party, the zoo, a pool, or a lunch with friends. I can't say we don't do anything because we are always doing something. I looked at the calendar yesterday and wouldn't you know it August is here and almost over. As much as I would like to say bummer I am kinda glad we will be back in a routine. Not that we will be given up our social life but we will have to decline some of the endless road trips for a night on the couch to watch Dancing With the Stars.
Morgan has really enjoyed this summer, as did I. I didn't feel like a walking baby carrying machine that every five seconds was removing something from a baby's mouth or inserting something healthy in the baby's mouth. I wasn't the mom barrelling behind a small infant hell bent on smashing her face into sharp objects or falling into a hole. This summer I was the mom who could relax a bit tip back a couple beers, watch every ones reaction when my toddler did what toddlers do, jump off stairs, hang from whatever piece of furniture would hold her tiny frame, run while inevitably stubbing a toe. I know her limits and what she is capable of and was there to brush off the ultimate fail, all part of growing up. Morgan went from riding a tricycle in the beginning of June to a two wheeler (with training wheels) by July.
Not sure where the time has gone if I stop and try to think about it I can't remember. It really does go by so fast, so fast that it makes me look at my girl with amazement the vocabulary that falls out of her mouth down to her actions on her face all photographed in my mind because there is no camera fast enough to take these pictures.