Friday, May 25, 2007

The drama of it all..

So SD has not always been good at keeping things in working order or keeping them in general. By things I mean gadgets pagers, walkmen, portable CD players, cell phones......things everyone must have(or so he thinks) and if something goes wrong with that one gadget good God the SKY IS FALLING CHICKEN F'ING LITTLE!!! Get your popcorn the show is about to being ready??

Ok....GO

The other day SD was over cutting the lawn as part of his responsibility, as to keep the house looking presentable for potential buyers. Setting the stage for those of you who don't know we have 3+ acres that is to be cut and a lawn mower (that for all intensive purposes was way beyond our means to purchase) does 360 turns on a dime and is pretty fast, no offense Lucky your "riding mower is still pimp", but our super fly Exmark can get'r done in under two hours. Side note; we have beer can holders on both sides for left or right handed fellas or if you prefer to be double fisted. On this particular day no beer was involved because if there was someone I am almost sure someone would have lost a limb. No on this day the cell phone was the casualty, apparently the phone had been riding in the cup holder and decided to plundge to its death in the middle of the yard, and take a spin on the under caridge. Mind you SD is one of very important people and if you don't have his number you should because apparently everyone calls him and it is the very reason he is alive and breathing and without it he was going down a slow and painful death. One that I hoped would take longer than him driving to the Sprint store a whole 30 minutes, to get a new phone. He did however keep me informed of his where abouts because he has wireless internet and e-mailed me to tell me he had the baby and was going to the Sprint store and would call when he replaced his phone. The e-mail was short and sweet "ran over my f'ing phone, I'm pissed,going to Sprint for a new one"! After paying almost as much as his mower he did get a new phone and the world stabalized until today;

I receive a phone call, number unrecoganizable to me, I pick up it could be the man I have been waiting for to lavish me with gifts.....

I pick up "Hello"

SD "I don't have a FUCKIN' phone!!!"

me thinking - oh it's you what now **sigh**

SD "I am using my friends phone he is here jacking up the deck so it doesn't sag for the next open house and people can't bitch and complain"

me "oh good , I mean well that sucks, where is your phone?"

SD "It fell out of my pocket into the hot tub when I was removing the water"

me "the cell phone you just bought?"

SD "Yes and I don't have another arm and leg to pay for another one!""and I need my phone how is anyone going to get a hold of me?"

me "yeh the that would be cause for alarm"

Days like these I am so glad it is no longer "my problem"!! Just bring me my baby so she is not subject to your ranting. In case of concern he did get another phone for free after drying out the phone he took it to the store and told them it just stopped working and they agreed and gave him a new phone. And everyone lived happily ever after..............until next time, who knows when that will be but I am sure it will be sooner than later.


Tuesday, May 22, 2007

Cars that go BOOM



Call it old age but can we stop short for a double take.... Please don't tell me your hooking up bass in your daddy's garage!
When I was in college my room mate and I were obsessed with La'Trimm, we even went so far to call each other Lady Tigra and Bunny D, I know what your thinking, in college? yes in college there was some small amounts of alcohol involved at times, but others we just thought it was plan out crazy fun! In fact when I looked up the lyrics to the song we would play every.single.time. we got in the car, I only had to read the first line to remember the whole damn thing!! The mind is a silly thing to waste. I can remember the man I was in love with had a low rider pick-up truck and when we would cruise around town you could feel your organs shake from the BOOM of the bass! Good thing I was much thinner back then because I would hate to feel the jiggle around my hips that I get now when I go over the railroad tracks.
The reason I am bringing up the whole crazy thing is yesterday while sitting at a light enjoying my easy listening radio at a more than reasonable volume with my windows down, this car behind made me feel like I was sitting in that pick-up truck back in 92'. And yes my sides started to jiggle a little!! But not as much as his rear view mirror that was barely hanging on. As I was sitting there at the longest light ever I started to get annoyed because damn it Total Eclipse of the Heart was on my radio and I couldn't even humm along(totally kidding) but not really. I must have really pissed some 30 & 40 somethings off back in my day. There should be a noise ordiance for when you are stuck in traffic on a hot spring day with your windows down. Except for when La'Trimm is on for flash back 80's, by all means turn it UP!!
Speaking of that old college room mate her birthday is tommorrow so I would like to dedicate this post to her. Bunny D if your out there reading this girlfriend love ya and miss ya hope your day is super fly....with BASS!!

Monday, May 21, 2007

Home Ownership

!!!!SUCKS!!!!
Will someone for the love of God please buy this house?!?
Just live with the minor details that need attention, I have for the past 6 years! Do not bitch and complain about the small leak that happened in the laundry room oh 3 years ago...so the drywall is a little cracked and moldy so what, it is the laundry room not everyone goes in there. If you walk across the hall oooohhhhh look down fresh new tile, see it trumps the ugly ceiling in the room next door. Never mind the crack on the living room wall between the kitchen and front room(note: not near the leak in laundry room) this crack was painted over and never patched, the crack has not moved in 4 years since the painting so were good. I think the crack will be more noticable if I patch it with caulk, sand it down, then re-paint it(maybe when you move in you can re-paint and fix the crack yourself). I guess that means you did not notice the freshly painted front doors when you entered the house, not to mention the potted petunias that match perfectly with the garnet red color I decided to paint the doors with. What's that.....the deck is sinking??? yeh it is fine it is supported with four posts under that there deck, the hot tub that sits upon it will not collapse under the weight of 6 people if they weigh under 100 pounds each. If you enjoy the hot tub in the evening hours you will hardly notice the bowing of the floor boards just watch your toes you might stub them on a nail pop. Please put into consideration that a single mom now lives in the house and the outside does not get the attention it once did when a man who once worshiped his yard has taken a time out....permanently!! So if you want the pond to look as good as it does in the picture on the internet your gonna have to get out there and tidy it up a bit yourself, you should have considered buying the house sooner. Yes I will get the carpets cleaned as soon as my daugther is fed enough and I have enough gas to get me to and from work for a week, no that is not a recent stain from the dog pissing on the carpet....does the house smell like dog??? I take that smell seriously and do everything in my power to elimanate any animal smells from my house without getting rid of the dog. I baked cookies fresh this morning so that the comfort of a chewy chocolate chips cookie would invite you to stay and put your feet up(so that you don't see the stain from a whole can of pop spilled over the coffee table either). Did you notice the entertainment wall of TV's downstairs? Perhaps you should take the flier home with you and reconsider what the house of your dreams can be when it is well cared. Oh forgot to mention I know the cost of fuel sucks and propane is not an exception, and you can be put on a budget plan so that the propane nazi does not come take your first born and hold her for colladeral. They are sympathic to your home heating needs, you just have to pay your bill on time, or they will let the tank run out late on a saturday night when it is below 0 and they are not open on sunday! So if your not going to buy the dam house give the flier to your annoying neighbor that you wish would move out of your current neighborhood and save you the time and hassle of moving. Thanks for stopping by, sorry we could not accommodate all your needs!

Friday, May 18, 2007

Grey's Party

Well last night was the big Grey's Anatomy Season Finale. As I mentioned in an earlier post I had tickets to go to the exclusive VIP party at LaSala Banquet Hall in Rochester and invited my friend Kellie to join me (she is also a big fan of Grey's). We had a great time the food was very swanky mostly appetizers, some sushi(Lucky would have totally been in heaven), veggie platters, cheese, crackers, the most beautiful desserts, and a chocolate fountain with all the necessary dippiable chunks of fruit and brownies. Yes I said chunks of brownie dripping with hot belguim chocolate YYYUUUUMMMMM!! The drinks were a little pricey, but hey all the food you can eat they had to make their money some how. I did end up snuggling "McSteamy" but in a different kind of way, they made up a martini type of shaker drink with his name on it for a whole $10.00!! He tasted a little bit sweeter than I would have imagined!
But the biggest highlight of the night was mingling and being interviewed with Glendia Lewis from channel 7 news. In fact my friend dr. Bray made the cut to be seen on the news check it out, she is the blonde with the freshesly applied lipstick and mentioning that she has a new Grey's fan on the way in her tummy!! Way to go dr.Bray I guess my interview was a bit bubbly and overly excited to make it on the 11pm news! That is ok my 15 seconds of fame will come someday. I will be when I win the Super Raffle!! so ;p
Seriously I will miss watching Grey's every week because I just can't get enough of the drama happening in a made for TV characters life, makes me feel more human! One good thing is I can catch up on other shows on the Tivo that have been neglected, due to my time constraints of viewing pleasure.

Thursday, May 17, 2007

Impeding Traffic - Revisited

Today started off good, I woke at my usual time and before baby so I was able to take a longer shower not just wash the hair and go. I didn't feel rushed or hurried. Most days I feel like K (see #3). Morgan told me a short story while I changed her this morning. I even had enough time to get coffee for my long drive into work (because construction sucks and unless I get a boat or helicopter the drive is an extra 30 minutes)! My hair even cooperated this morning.
So why couldn't the judge be just as good and rip up the silly ticket I got last month? for a sign I SWEAR has not been in existance for very long, but her and the cop swear it has. I took two hours out of work to be told that unless I pled guilty and pay my fine I would be charged for court fees as well as points on my record if the asshole cop takes the stand and proves I was at fault. Come on you look like a nice lady judge why can't you give a hard working single mom a break?? is what I wanted to say but seeing that I was the first one in front of oh 50 or so people behind me, I was at a loss for words and she did all the talking. Seeing that she is the one with the big title "Magistrate" and not a "commoner" I thought whining to her first thing in the morning was not going to fly. So I simply changed my plea and paid my damn ticket, I am a weak peasant!! As I whined not to the judge but to the woman behind me about the $125 fine she simply said it could be worse I may go to jail for impaired driving with a much larger fine. Yep I have it much easier and should just keep my trap shut! I should take advice from my daugther and just stick my whole foot in my mouth, she is so good at it right now.
The day is now a gloomy one not only is my pocket book $125 lighter and I will not be eating until next week(bonus weight loss). I had to go out for work and my hair is now sticking to my head because of the drizzled rain and high wind I had to run through when I got out of the car.
I am really looking forward to the Grey's Anatomy party tonight, one glass of wine should chill me out or maybe two depending on the drive home.

Wednesday, May 16, 2007

mmmmm...mmmmmm

The constant "mmmmm.....mmmmm" noise that one can only assume is coming from the construction truck down the street, has been the only noise that has poked at my senses for the PAST.8.HOURS.
That is all for now, just thought I would take you all down with me while I slowly go insane.

Tuesday, May 15, 2007

"McSteamy"

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Monday, May 14, 2007

FOOOOORRRRE!

Mother's Day a day to appreciate all moms who put forth the extra effort to make a difference in a childs life! For all you mom's I hope your day was as special as mine.
I woke to my beautiful baby babbling and sucking on her toes in her crib, yes both at the same time, and I brought her in my bed with me to have her morning bottle. Just like every morning her and I lay in bed talking about our dreams from the night before. On this day I was over joyed that I am having a chance to take on motherhood, and was reminded as I received 7 phone calls all before 9am that I am truly blessed to have this miracle in my life. Not only is it rewarding but it can be all overwhelming and the hours you spend taking on this challenge make you hunger for a much needed time-out!
My time-out consisted of brunch with the family and taking in a game of golf with my mother in-law and sister in-law. When Morgan and I arrived at my sister in-laws we were greeted with a glass of champagne before 11am, and before food, which made for an early buzz.... I was in for a fun-filled day! Brunch at the club house had more food than your average Sveden House with much more flavor. After filling up the men took the children so the women could go golfing. It was my first time on the golf course and I was looking forward to being outside and having a few more cocktails. Who knew having a few drinks on a Sunday afternoon could be so rewarding. Lucky I hear you clapping!! I guess I hit the ball pretty good, judging by the way my sister in-law threw down her club and exclaimed "I'm Out" I think I was hitting better than her at times. Where I really shined was on the green itself, the years of putt-putt paid off! A fun time was had by all, and I think I need to rest up a little to get ready for next year. When we returned home we don't know exactly what happened to the men, they were like cockroaches running for the nearest hole after we flipped on the light. But the children were well feed with powdered donuts and sugar drinks, which reminded us that we needed to sober up and order pizza! By the time I returned home at the wee hour of 7:30pm Morgan and I had all but enough of Mother's Day and were both in bed by 8:30pm and passed OUT.
Happy 1st Mother's Day to me! It was a memorable one. Almost forgot to mention the gifts, not only did SD send me cute pics of Morgan (see previous post) he also made a card with Morgan on the front and wrote a letter from her telling me how happy she is to have a Mom like me and her favorite part of the day is when she sees me after work, and how no one in the whole world could love her more than I do!! It was very heart warming!! It came with gift certificates for Kohl's, Marshall's, and BD's Mongolian BBQ. Morgan also went shopping with my sister and got me a travel coffee mug one with a clear outside to put her pictures in it, a shirt, and candied almonds. Gifts from the in-laws included a new bath robe, Pj's, and a Tim McGraw CD!! Who knew having a child would bring so many gifts!! Just having Morgan was gift enough for me.

Friday, May 11, 2007

So sometimes SD does nice things...



So this morning I woke to Morgan yelling DA-Da-GA-DA-Da-Da, followed by the blowing of raspberries...much to my dismay her first words are DA and not MA!! But I keep thinking she is to young and she doesn't know any better. If I was to take a survey 8 out of 10 babies probably say DA as their first words RIGHT???? I am sure I have done nothing to piss her off at such young an age, I worship the ground the baby kicks and screams on. It is what is and I love to listen to her babble even if it is about her absent 5 days a week DA!!
Well today she is with her DA-Da and I dressed her in an outfit bought by her Uncle Jason ready to cheer on the home team tonight. GO WINGS!! I think SD digs it too, for those of you who don't know he is a big sports nut(would explain the years of negliect as a husband,sorta). Anyway she looks bored to death of SD's constant baby talk but is still cute!

Thursday, May 10, 2007

Shots post bar days

Shots are a little different than they were in my 20's. These shots don't have funny names like red-headed slut, blow job, oatmeal cookie, or jagger bomb. Gone are the days of sovernior test tubes of all the new pucker apple, raspberry, or root beer flavored liquor you can handle. Now a days shots that I refer to have names like Hep B, Hib, IPV, and PVC just to name a few.
Yesterday Morgan had to go to the doctor for her 6 month check-up. Something I have been putting off for a couple weeks already and finally gave in to the constant good angel on my left shoulder saying be a good mommy. The reason I had been putting off the doctors office is so that I didn't have to go through watching a new nurse take a stab not once but 3 times at my daugthers legs. The new immunization chart for children these days is just INSANE!! I know with all the new dieases out there one can't be to cautious, or can you? I just hate the few days after she gets her shots she stares off into space and is irriatable, feverish, and tired it makes me nervous. I know it is probably all normal many kids go through it everyday. I just feel it is a little extreme to be pumping chemicals into a 14 pound babbling bundle of joy.
Other than the shots Morgan is a whole 14 lbs 13oz and 21 3/4 inches long, a little short for her percentile, and is doing what her milestones say she should.
By the weekend Morgan and I should be over the whole shots ordeal. Just in time to share in my first mothers day, which I am so excited about. Not only do I get a small break for a brunch with my MIL and SIL followed by 9 holes of golf that I have never played but am going to give it a try. I can't wait to come home and just be with Morgan, to enjoy a life I created and continue to be ever so greatful at the chance to be called a MOM!

Tuesday, May 8, 2007

B.A. (Bloggers Anonymous)

I need some serious help....I can't help spending hours reading other people's blogs! Is there such a thing as bloggers anonymous? no not the stupid anonymous post that annoys the crap out of me. I mean like A.A.(Alcholics Anonymous), seriously I am addicted!! Not only reading my friends blogs, don't get me wrong I enjoy reading what they have on their minds, but sometimes they don't updated as frequently( I am also guilty I am not that frequent because I am busy reading). What is wrong with me are people sending out subliminal messages on their sites or what?
There are some serious bloggers out there not only do they write far better than I ever could, but their lives are far more interesting. They also have really cool titles with their own designs, not just the blogger template I use. Don't even get me started with the flicker pictures!! I don't even know these people yet I am drawn to look their photos, some are really awesome candid pics of people or things in actions, it is true when a picture speaks a thousand words, some even more. Things to check out if you have spare time;
So Close - a woman on parenthood with twins, after infertility
So the Fish Said... - her blog has monthly letters to her beautiful daughter
A Little Pregnant - another journey of infertility to miracle check out her blogs of plenty!
Rockstar Mommy - she is hiralious writer and so hip
Nadine - she is from the Netherlands and came to the US to vacation with a fellow blogger
Docce Taste Like Rainbows - she has daily photos of life and her dog, her photos are awesome
Cooking with Whine - daily recipes with photos
There are many more I have visited but this is just for starters. I am a LOSER, I need to work for the money I get every friday. Please if you are my boss reading this do not remove my priviledges to the internet world, for my intentions are good. And quite frankly I think I will slip into a deep depression without contact to other life stories bigger than my own!

Monday, May 7, 2007

Show ME the Money


I am not much of a gambler but the new Michigan raffle has me hooked......introducing Super Raffle! Better get yours while they are HOT! only 250,000 tickets will be sold. I know $50 is alot for the average person to lay down on a lottery ticket but the odds are awesome. So cut back on your Starbuck Lattes, your Payless Shoes, your un-necessary trips to the salon to paint your toes, and pony up for a ticket! Heck maybe you could pick a friend or two to pitch in on a ticket and split the winnings. My boss and I went 50/50.
I don't want to be a single mom in the red anymore. After reading this article it was refreshing to know I am not the only one in a financial crisis. I just want to get a hold of my life again, a million could help in a big way! I want to start putting away more money so that I can afford to take Morgan on nice vacations and still have enough for her college education.
Good Luck, be sure to leave your address for post cards if I choose to let you know where I will be on vacation June 19.

Friday, May 4, 2007

If I only had a brain


Meet my soon to be ex-husband not your average Joe.................................> not what you were expecting?? Hum, me neither took me over 12 years to figure it out. You would think I was the one who went to Oz for a brain! Leaves we wondering are all men like him?? Do they all lack a certain brain? He seems to forget I was with him for all those years and I can tell when he is lying or when he wants to get out of something.

Just a quick note he reeeeaaally wants to be a good dad, he just doesn't know how. Shame on him for not wanting to repair his marriage and share in his daugthers life on more than a part time level. But he is the one who decided he doesn't want to come home to a marriage he is un-happy in for the sake of a child. (yep that is what he says, but he still loves me and will do anything for me) HHHHMMMM!WTF?

This week I had a gliche in my babysitting set-up, and I have had more than one consecutive week where I had to juggle things around, no big deal. Ex-husband who we will refer to as SD(sperm donor) because I just don't like saying ex-husband for the fact that husband is in the title and as far as I am concerned he doesn't deserve the title after his continued dis-respect to me. SD watches baby twice(t&f) a week and any other times it is like pulling teeth(but he wants me to live my life and get time for myself) and he never calls on weekends (because she is 6 months old and he can't talk directly to her, but when she is old enough he will call all the time, just wait) Yeha I am not holding my breathe! When SD called yesterday in the AM he was sick with what he calls the flu(when in actuality it is an upset stomach that he likes to milk) he was going to the doctor and after he was going to pick up baby at his mom's so I did not have to drive across town to get her, but I was thinking don't do me any favors I don't need her sick with your flu, and it did not bother me to drive across town, because that is what I do on thursdays. I told him do not pick her up go home and rest. Well he watches baby fridays and by thurs afternoon he felt even more sick and did not think he could watch baby on friday after rest. So I looked around for sitters and I found some and I was going to accomodate his illness until......I get a call from my friend who happens to have seen him playing softball at 9pm at night. Well I knew I smelt a liar! If he is so sick why is he not in bed! I try to call him at least 3 times to see if he was going to watch his daughter the next morning? No answer. Finally at 11pm almost 3 minutes into my r.e.m. sleep he calls(sounds as if he is in a bathroom because of the echo) and says that he is still really sick did I find anyone? So I said NO and see you in the morning.....all while thiking you no good lying sack of shit who is standing in a bathroom at the ball diamonds with a beer in one hand and a sorry excuse for manhood in the other while clutching the phone to his ear pressed against his shoulder and trying to get me to believe he is sick. Well momma don't play and you will take your responsibilty seriously and watch my baby tomorrow. You have all weekend to rest and have your trailor park nurse take care of your stomach ache.
So he is at my house now watching my baby, as well he should!